Rejected Titles for The Smiths’ Album “Meat Is Murder”

Indie Rock/Post-Punk’s loudest vegetarian is Morrissey, lead singer of  The Smiths.  As a staunch vegetarian, he forbade the rest of the band to ever be photographed eating meat and insisted the venues at which they performed did not sell meat the night of the show.  Controlling band-mates was not enough, Morrissey tried to convince the impressionable youth of England that eating meat was morally suspect. Hence, The Smiths’ second album was called “Meat Is Murder.”

Recently, a handwritten list of other potential album titles was found in between two cushions on a couch at the studio where the album was recorded.  In the list, shown below, the first seven titles are in Morrissey’s handwriting, while the last three were in the hand of Johnny Marr, the band’s guitarist. In the list one can see the progression of comparison of common animal-based dishes with crimes of increasing magnitude.  Eventually, Morrissey settled on the all-inclusive “meat” and the greatest crime of all.


Deviled Kidneys Is Fingers Nails on a Chalkboard

Black Pudding Is a Snatch and Run on The Tube

Fish & Chips are Assault & Battery

Meat Pies are a Handsy Vicar

Bologna Is Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Beef Wellington Is Bamboo under the Fingernails

Shepherd’s Pie Is Class B Offence [40FB: In England, offences involving serious violence or damage, and serious drug offences.]

Roast Beef Is Sex with a Minor

Jellied Eel Is Jellied Eel.

Margaret Thatcher Is Sexy

Morrissey Tastes Like Chicken

I Eat Cannibals


Check back for more music and food mash-ups with bat recipes from Ozzy Osbourne and meat loaf recipes from Meat Loaf.

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