Other Presidential Secrets

After reading recently that Abraham Lincoln might have been gay or at least bi-sexual, we were dying to know what other presidential secrets were kept out of our textbooks. To satisfy our curiosity, we contacted noted presidential historians to dig up sordid details and little known facts you can share at your next dinner party.

George Washington: Was a biter. During the First Continental Congress Washington chased John Adams around the meeting place trying to bite him. Washington did manage to bite John Hancock, which is why Hancock did not let Washington sign the Declaration of Independence.

John Adams: As the first President to live in the current White House, he wanted to paint in orange, but his wife Abigail talked him out of it as she did not think orange was a color befitting the office of President.

James K. Polk: Wanted Texas to change its name to “James-K.-Polk-is-Awesome Land” as a condition for its joining of the United States. Congress overruled him.

Millard Fillmore: Always wanted to be a ballerina.

Andrew Johnson: While he had no Vice President, he secretly considered a Standard Poodle named Mr. Wigglesworth his Vice President.

Ulysses S. Grant: Was jealous of Mr. Wigglesworth.

Chester A. Arthur: Was afraid of the letter Q.

Teddy Roosevelt: Mustache was really a mink pelt he shot while hunting in Siberia.

William Howard Taft: The heaviest President, topping out at 340 pounds, he ate all 39 bills he vetoed while in office.

Woodrow Wilson: A kleptomaniac; nearly caused an international incident when he tried to still some silverware from a state dinner at Versailles.

Calvin Coolidge: Would hoard mashed potatoes in his desk.

Hebert Hoover: Would often refer to occasional bouts of constipation as the “Hoover Dam.”

Franklin Roosevelt: Once placed a whoopee-cushion in Stalin’s seat at Yalta.

Harry Truman: Liked to have Secret Service agents give him piggy back rides throughout the White House.

Dwight D. Eisenhower: Wanted the national interstate system to spell out “I Like Ike”.

John F. Kennedy: Considered his inability to bed a particularly attractive White House secretary of Cuban descent the Second Cuban Missile Crisis.

Lyndon B. Johnson: Claimed his appendix scar was an escape hatch for his “Commander in Chief”.

Richard Nixon: Was the inspiration for the Beach Boys’ “Barbara Ann”.

Gerald Ford: Secretly plotted with Henry Kissinger to steal Chevy Chases’ nose.

Jimmy Carter: Liked to dress up in a Mr. Peanut costume when gettin’ busy with Mrs. Carter.

Ronald Reagan: Was ready to nuke the Soviets if the “Miracle on Ice” went the other way.

George H. W. Bush: A mama’s boy.

Bill Clinton: Wanted to open a library simply because he thought librarians were “smokin’.”


With Bill LaViolette

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